I love the Fall. I like pumpkins (to look at). I loathe the concept of Pumpkin-Spiced everything. I like nicely decorated pumpkins, but I am no fan of Halloween. I’m sorry, but that’s the way I feel.

I don’t want to lose your friendship or following, but I have to be honest, and Halloween is (to me) a giant disappointment, jacked-up on sugar. [HYPOCRISY ALERT: I do appreciate a “fun size” candy bar — the kind they sell for Halloween: it’s the only time of the year I eat a Baby Ruth, Bit’o’Honey, or mini 3 Musketeers.]


With that out of the way, let me wax on my five good things for the week.

1) Ankle boots. Who’d a thunk they would make the difference between a decent outfit and a cool one? (Though not terribly, preppy, alas.) With pants they are fantastic. I like them because they take no time to put on. I used to hate the way an ankle boot looked with a gap between the ankle and the hem of a skirt or dress, but I’ve been persuaded that that’s a good proportion.


2) Tiffany Haddish is hilarious. She is one antidote to all the negativity that surrounds us. Once, while seeing a comedy in a movie theater, I saw a trailer for “Night School,” in which Tiffany Haddish’s 30 seconds were funnier than anything I paid to see. You need to figure out who makes you smile these days and keep their video or audio clips on your desktop. For emergencies.


3) Days When I cross all my tasks and projects off my to do list.

These don’t happen frequently. I’m hoping that by putting this into its digitally permanent place I will goad myself into having more productive days. You know how it is — you’re in the middle of doing something — working on a project, researching health insurance plans, writing a thank you note — and then, PING! A news alert. Your train of thought is interrupted, and you begin to worry about what’s going on in Washington, or Turkey, or the house next door. You call your elderly dad just to say hi. You text your kids to make sure they’re where you think they are. You start telling everyone you love them before you say goodbye on the phone…. even your Spectrum customer service robot.

Experts say that to-do lists are part of the secret to the success of …. the successful. So put that into your vape.


4) VOTING. It’s our right and a privilege of being an American citizen. Please do it. I’ve got mine here and will send it in today, as I will not be home on Election Day.


5) Please tell me there are no Robert Mueller Halloween costumes, or worse, “Sexy Mueller” costumes. That would just…. be wrong. Keeping Mueller in my thoughts, and ask that you do too.

Stay calm and act natural